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Review: Justified: The Complete Third Season DVD

I might have been guilty in the past of pointing out that Timothy Olyphant looks like a date-rapist, and I stand by that. But at the time I'd never been exposed to the splendour of Justified.

Here's why I don't get on with American Horror Story

This guy. Supposedly they're a normal family who moved into a haunted house, but the bloke never puts a shirt on and he looks like this with it off. And human beings don't actually look like that, so I lost interest. Oh, and Dylan McDermott shirtless topless abs, by the way, Google.

Andrew Lincoln gets a phone call

Always the way. You get in after a hard day at the office/factory/zombie killing fields, all you want to do is enjoy a nice sit-down, and the bloody phone rings. But who's calling? The Governor? Merle? The ghost of T-Dog?

Chandler Riggs makes me feel old

"Chandler Riggs," I thought to myself idly tonight. "Ha! What was he, named after Chandler from Friends?" Turns out the kid was born in 1999, when Friends had been on the air for five years. So yeah, that's perfectly plausible. There's so little of my life left.

Walking Dead kid annoyingly precocious, T-Dog a hero

Your friend and mine: T-Dog. The Walking Dead season three starts on FX, Friday 19th October, 10pm.

Dexter dismembers sister, reassembles corpse wrong way round

Either that or it's just a really shitty Photoshop job.

Dexter/Sesame Street mashup

Sesame Street was brought to you today by the letter 'Y'. Full season seven trailer here.

Dexter to spend season seven beating off in bed

Look, sorry, but I see someone squirming under bedsheets, I make a masturbation joke. It's just how I'm wired. See here for the other TV spot in which Jennifer Carpenter flicks herself off to 50 Shades of Grey.

Win Falling Skies: The Complete First Season on DVD

Do you like aliens? Do you like free stuff? Do you like free stuff about aliens? Wait, do you also like Dr John Carter from ER? I think you know where I’m going with this…

Dexter season seven promo stuff remarkably similar to season six

Look serious and haunted, that's good, look at the camera seriously and hauntedly, yes, and ... lunch.