The Apprentice: season 12, episode 7 recap: "The Sea Word"
Posted by Becky Suter at 08:00 on 22 Nov 2016
Lord Sugar greets the candidates aboard a super-yacht in his swim trunks, flippy-floppies and nautical pashmina. I don't know much about business, but I imagine a great deal is done aboard big boats. This week's task involves selling boat products to people who can afford to have boats. Never let it be said Sugar's lost his touch with the common people.
Before he goes off for a little paddle, Sugar makes Frances Project Manager of Nebula, whilst Karthik is given control of Team Titan. Karthik thinks he's the best man for the job because he project-managed the conception of his son. Please stand back everyone, as I project-manage ejecting my dinner from my stomach.
The teams travel down to Poole, with Samuel confidently announcing he can't see himself losing to Nebula, figuring Frances is only one stamp away from claiming a free coffee at the Sad Café. Thanks to the BBC's heavy-handed editing, I think we can confidently say this is foreshadowing.
There is then a terrible half-hour where people talk a lot about "watersports", and piss about on jet-skis. Karthik threatens to take his trousers off and Frances tries to sell a boat and its wonderful "sports canapé". Not learning anything from last week, Jessica continues to lie about her made-up family in order to sell a snorkel, but no one's buying it. Literally.
This has been officially the worst task ever. A strange woman ghosted Dillon over some fish pillows, and Samuel claims he sold the toweling robes at the "R.I.P." price. The figures are in and Frances ends up trouncing Karthik by well over 40k, although now some poor sap is going to get shock when they get an invoice from the Beeb for a boat they thought they were only pretending to buy.
Nebula get to row, row, row their boats gently up the stream with Olympian James Cracknell, with Frances gleefully tossing her Bridge Café loyalty card into the waves, which ends up floating out to sea and somehow causes an oil tanker to run aground. Nice one, Frances.
Who got fired?
Karthik might actually be the first person who talks themselves into getting fired. Sugar is so tired of his blowing hot air, he fires him before he can bring anyone back into the boardroom.
Does he thank him?
No, the ungrateful bastard.
Who else got fired?
As sub-team leader, Grainne is asked which three need to come back to the boardroom but manages to escape walking the plank, even though she failed to sell a single jet-ski. Sugar must decide whether Dillon, Alana or Samuel will be keel-hauled behind his super-yacht.
Everyone agrees Dillon and Alana are very nice people; is Sugar softening? Because he's too much of a loose cannon for constantly knocking money off, Samuel is given his concrete shoes and taxi fare to Beachy Head. That's the real RIP price.
Does he thank him?
A curt "thanks" under his breath.
Next week, the candidates must explain exactly what the Electoral College is.