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The Apprentice: season 13, episode 10 recap: "John Fashionu"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 23:45 on 12 Dec 2017
The Apprentice: season 13, episode 10 recap: "John Fashionu"
Good job it's my turn, because what I don't know about fashion isn't worth knowing. I bought three pairs of trousers the other week. On the same day. I know.

The Apprentice: season 13, episode 7 recap: "Expando Ballet"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 10:00 on 21 Nov 2017
The Apprentice: season 13, episode 7 recap: "Expando Ballet"
Because cars aren't in the least bit interesting, and anyone who thinks they are interesting is an imbecile, it is especially hard for me to get around the fact that I was quite engaged by this episode of The Apprentice. A lot of it was about cars, you see.

The Apprentice: season 13, episode 6 recap: "Bruged Egos"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 23:45 on 13 Nov 2017
The Apprentice: season 13, episode 6 recap: "Bruged Egos"
Off we head to Bruges, city of culture, chocolate and small-scale fraud. You get the feeling this is one member state for which March 2019 can't come fast enough.

The Apprentice: season 13, episode 4 recap: "Stadium Ruck"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 23:45 on 30 Oct 2017
The Apprentice: season 13, episode 4 recap: "Stadium Ruck"
Apparently when Queen played Wembley Stadium in 1986, which we can all agree was among the greatest concerts of all time, it only cost you fifteen quid to get in. Thirty-one years on, a few hours in a corporate box there costs you two and a half grand, and you've got to listen to Harrison sing.

The Apprentice: season 13, episode 2 recap: "Panic Room"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 00:16 on 17 Oct 2017
The Apprentice: season 13, episode 2 recap: "Panic Room"
There are too many of them. The Apprentice always trudges through its early weeks like an underfunded, overcrowded crèche, full of puffed-up, bellicose rugrats wanting the biggest rusk. The reality of editing it down to an hour means there are always those who can keep their heads down for a few weeks and ride it out till their first reckoning around Bonfire Night. As such, I have no idea what half their names are and I'm fucked if I'm going to bother learning them.

Hardy to get knob out on CBeebies

Posted by Ed Williamson at 12:45 on 06 Apr 2017
Hardy to get knob out on CBeebies
Tom Hardy's popular stint on Bedtime Stories is to end with a series finale in which he just shows you his penis.

My Google audio history is just recordings of me watching Friends

Posted by Ed Williamson at 16:45 on 01 Apr 2017
My Google audio history is just recordings of me watching Friends
This is a low point if I'm honest.

The Apprentice: season 12, episode 12 recap: "Cakermaker"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 23:30 on 20 Dec 2016
The Apprentice: season 12, episode 12 recap: "Cakermaker"
After years of affecting to be above it all like the dickhead I am, it finally happened. I cared who won The Apprentice. "Alana's has the less risk of the two business plans," I said to myself. "Surely Lord Sugar will see that; what self-respecting businessman wouldn't?" Well played, 2016. You win.

The Apprentice: season 12, episode 10 recap: "A Kick in the Botanicals"

Posted by Ed Williamson at 23:30 on 12 Dec 2016
The Apprentice: season 12, episode 10 recap: "A Kick in the Botanicals"
There's one man left and five women, just like that dream I keep having about being overpowered by the female Gladiators.

Your easy flowchart guide to Westworld plot twists

Posted by Ed Williamson at 16:00 on 03 Dec 2016
Your easy flowchart guide to Westworld plot twists
Heard tell on social media that there's a huge twist coming in Westworld? Whichever character it involves, allow us to simplify it for you.